After getting back to the village, I go talk to Miss Lan right away.
“Miss Lan.”
She’s with Mister Dongu and Mister Sileva, and all three look my way.
“Oh, it’s you Lerunda. What is it?”
Says Miss Lan with a gentle smile.
Every time I see it, I can’t help but think about how much I like that smile.
“Hum… I want to talk, to Mister Ilma, for a bit.”
Everyone looks surprised. I don’t think they were expecting these words to come out of my mouth.
“Lerunda, we don’t know what that priest’s devotion to you might lead him to do. That’s why we only let him stay in this village under certain conditions.”
“Yes, but… After watching Phyto and her people, I want to face this too.”
“Phyto?
“Yes. Phyto is doing a good job, dealing with her people. She says, she won’t let them do anything rash.”
Phyto is facing her people, to make sure their feelings towards the special being known as the miko don’t lead them to do anything rash.
But all I’ve been doing is running away, and turning my back on this issue.
“I’m… Just running away. I decided to live as the miko, and use this power, so I will make sure, mister Ilma doesn’t do anything that will cause problems.”
“…Lerunda, if this doesn’t go well, the worst case scenario is that we may have to take their lives.”
“Yes. I understand.”
Mister Ilma and Miss Shehan are locked inside because we’re afraid that they might cause problems.
If they stay inside, we can keep those problems to a minimum, but if they start going outside and seeing the village, that could turn into a problem.
If their presence in this village starts to bring negative effects, they might lose their lives.
I understand this very well, and I decide to take a step forward anyway.
“I’ll do my best, to not let that happen.”
I’ve accepted that I’m the miko, and decided to live as the miko.
I’m sure the same thing that’s happening with Mister Ilma now is going to happen many more times.
If I can’t make it work with one person, how can I hope to make it work when it happens with more and more people?
Miss Lan and the others made sure I don’t have to face him, for my sake. Otherwise, it might lead to something that will make me sad.
But even if I’m happy now, that’s not going to last forever if I don’t face this problem.
The village is doing well now, but we don’t know how long that’s going to last. If I don’t face this problem now, it might come back as an even bigger problem later when something happens.
“…Thank you for worrying about me, but it’s alright. I understand, but I want to face him. I know that might be a bother, and I will need help, if it doesn’t go well, but still… I want to face him.”
This choice I’m making might cause problems for everyone else. It might not go well.
I don’t really understand this ‘faith’ in me that exists inside Mister Ilma, and I say that if it doesn’t go well I’m going to need help, which is very naive.
Still, I want to face him.
I unconsciously start talking quieter, and facing the ground.
I start thinking that they’re going to stop me, but I feel someone patting my head. I look up and see Mister Dongu with a kind smile on his face.
Mister Sileva’s looks like he’s thinking it can’t be helped, and Miss Lan speaks.
“Then I won’t oppose you. If you’ve thought this through and made your decision, I’ll support you.
If you’re that determined, I’ll make sure to help you do this, and also help you if it does go badly. Still…”
Miss Lan looks at me and laughs.
“You’ve grown, Lerunda. I’m glad I can be with you and watch you grow.”
She says as she smiles gently. Mister Dongu and mister Sileva also smile like they agree, and I get a little embarrassed.
—Girl and faith – Part one
(The miko tells the others what she’s determined to do.)
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